excerpt from Love Lost, Love Found

      Dane dreamed he was kissing Sayer, body warm against his and mouth soft and pliable. He woke to his alarm beeping. Reluctantly, he threw back the covers and got out of bed, wishing he could go back to the dream, which seemed so real, he could still feel the phantom of Sayer’s lips on his.
      On his way into the bathroom, Dane ran into Sayer coming down the hall, a smile on his lips until his gaze moved down Dane’s body to the crotch of his thin cotton pants, at which point his mouth fell open.
      Dane glanced down, mortified to see he was sporting a sizable erection. His face heated.
      “I was coming to see if your alarm went off. Dinner’s waiting.” Sayer turned and walked back down the hall.
      Dane ducked into the bathroom and shut the door, leaning against it for a moment.
      “Holy shit.”
      He turned to the sink and splashed his face with cold water. When his cock had settled, he peed, flushed, and washed his hands.
      By the time he entered the kitchen, he was more or less composed.
      “Did you try out the art supplies?” Dane took a seat at the table, which was already set.
      “Yeah, I couldn’t resist.” Sayer brought the last plate to the table, and they sat down.
      “Smells wonderful.” Dane looked appreciatively at the spread.
      Sayer had baked the chicken Dane had had in the refrigerator, and along with that, he’d cooked carrots, asparagus, and the few new potatoes Dane had had in the pantry. As they ate, Dane’s eyes kept going to Sayer’s face. He looked good — rested and happy. The blue shirt he wore really brought out the color of his eyes, and Dane couldn’t help thinking about the dream and the kiss. His cock stirred in his pants, and Dane was glad that this time it was hidden by the table.
      “Busy shift?” Sayer cut into his potato.
      “An eighteen-wheeler caught fire on the interstate.”
      “Anyone hurt?”
      “Fortunately, no. We got there before things got too bad, and the driver was already out.”
      “Must be pretty exciting, what you do.”
      “Most of the time it’s pretty dull, actually. We sit around the firehouse and play cards, eat, work out, and sleep. I have a couple of books I keep there. That’s about it. Unless there’s a call, of course.”
      “You said your co-workers gave you a hard time about me?”
      “Yeah. They were just worried about me taking home a stranger.” Dane speared a carrot and popped it into his mouth.
      “Do they know you’re gay?” Sayer tilted his head, eyes curious.
      “I told them after Liz died. I couldn’t lie anymore. That’s also when I came out to my family.”
      “How did that go?”
      “Let’s just say we don’t talk anymore.”
      “I’m sorry.”
      “It’s okay.” Dane felt Sayer looking at him and raised his eyes, but although Sayer seemed to want to say something, he remained silent. The air charged between them, and Dane suddenly didn’t feel hungry anymore. For food, anyway.
      He kept eating, though, and when they were both finished, he stood to clear the table.
      “My turn for dish duty.”
      Sayer walked onto the back porch, and from the window Dane watched him sit down at the easel. As Dane scrubbed each dish before stacking it in the small dish washer, he thought about the look they’d exchanged during dinner. He hadn’t imagined the interest in the other man’s eyes, and he hadn’t imagined the way he’d wanted to cross the distance between them and …
      Dane took a deep breath.

                       Down, boy. Take it easy.

 

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